A first time mom labor and delivery stories is a personal birthing story of becoming a mom. We all have a birthing plan right? This is my birthing story.
When the birthing plan flies out the window
My birthing plan was to birth in a pool at home away from hospital with no drugs.
Lets see what really happened?
Being in the hospital, with a nurse sweeping me for the first time as their full forearm fished around, whilst smiling at me and saying babies in great position Danielle, oh let me just check…..
Oh oh…..do take your time up there sweetheart, it’s only my fanny your invading, elbow deep.
Having the Strip lights, the noise, the arrayed audience of the amazing staff, a belt tied around my stomach to monitor babies progress and lying on my back, continually throughout the labour, to check the baby, and being induced……….
My birth plan was well and truly tossed out the window.
Natural!, there’s nout natural about any of this.
We are all interconnected
As I crawled to the labour ward unable to sit in the wheelchair, I begged the staff to “just cut me, I can’t do this” as they reminded me…….you’ve got this, your ok.
“I want my mum, can you please call my mum?” I asked, having said cheerio to them at 8pm that night, very content that I can do this on my own, I don’t need anyone,
I’ll see you when Sebs here, very excited at that time and now 4am, very scared, very vulnerable, and very aware of how much I needed support.
As my parents arrived between contractions and my father asked me, how my meditation and deep breathing was going? With a Cheshire Cat glib grin, plastered across his mush, I could only reply with a
“fuck off”
as he left the room giggling.
First time mom labor and delivery stories no drugs
The staff asked me to have some morphine, as my abs were tensing, rather than relaxing. I was effectively hindering rather than helping Sebs progress.
“If you have some morphine it’ll really help you to relax”.
Having been defeated in all ticks to my birth plan, my ego was still leading at present and barking adamantly…… I am not taking drugs.
I was on gas and air, but morphine, I’m not taking that.
Nothing could prepare me for labour pains. Every time a contraction came, I tensed, holding my breath, because the pain was indescribable.
Two hours passed and the nurse said again……
“Please take morphine Danielle, your abs are so strong and you are not helping your son right now, you’re resisting him, you’ve got to relax on contractions not tense. Please have a shot of morphine.”
So overwhelmed with pain I finally ticked off my last birth plan, “what I don’t want” off the list, and with gas and air in hand, after the shot, announced to the room, that
“I can do this, I can do anything”
before dropping the gas and air on the floor and breathing through the contractions.
Ride a different birth wave
By now everything and everyone annoyed me. The planned music turned to
“Turn that fucking music off”
Your alright, my mum attempted to comfort me rubbing her hand on my knife stabbing pained back, unknown to all that I was having a back to back birth.
I retorted “Stop touching me.”
I’d suddenly delved very deep within, thank you morphine, connecting with Seb and breathing, out, out, out.
After a couple of hours the withdrawals started and I asked the nurse
“Can I have another shot please?”
but was denied anything further for two hours, as I started crying like a toddler, saying two hours, and pleaded for some Valium.
“I only want one, please, it’s agony,”
as they reassured me to keep breathing out, out, out, you’re ok Danielle, you’ve got this. You’re nearly there.
The nurse asked me to
“sit on the bed till I check you again”
and I remember very assertively and clearly, saying, with a finger pointed looking her right in the eyes, like, I mean business, woman
“I am not lying on the bed again, I can’t”
as I clung on all fours on the upright bed.
Feeling the labour pains key
How do you know when to push if you can’t feel?
I need to push, as they checked me on all fours and I started squeezing, oooo that’s a very small baby, omg that’s my arsehole, it’s
a shit out.
I’m presently on all fours, shitting myself to an audience of people behind me, but remember really not caring, by then.
The staff were delightfully dear, at disposing of the dirt, but I felt this inner urge of you’ve got to push now, as I pushed and the nurse announced.
“Here’s the head Danielle, push Danielle, push with all your might”
as my armoured abs, shot Seb out, way too fast, and the nurse went
Wo wo not so hard, gentle we don’t want to hurt him and you.
Listen to your mentors
On your next contraction, I’m going to tell you when to push and when to hold ok, and just like that, this beautiful, healthy, boy, lay safe in my arms.
The student nurse, having witnessed, the wide-angle screen style 5-hour length labour, went outside and fainted.
I was so fixated on the thought of his head coming out and actually in hindsight, that was my best bit, because by then, I knew, I was nearly there.
All the fears, tears, emotional rollercoaster journey, of exercising in pregnancy of what ifs, were done and sincerely forgotten as I stared into the eyes of the most wonderful human I’d ever encountered, as he held my thumb and stared right back at me.
Hiya sweetheart how you doing, well done Seb. Welcome to the world baby.
He recognised my voice, he understood me on a much deeper level than verbal communication ever creates. He got my energy and he snuggled up on my heart and fell asleep.
“Well done mum” the nurse said, as I realised I’m now a mum, woooohhhhhh.
Listen to your heart
When we lead with the head our ego enlightens us. It can fill us with doubt and deceit and a mantra mindset of “I can’t do this” but when we go in and listen to our body, really find that connection, found in our breathe, that power that’s in us, to guide ourselves through a very painful, yet enlightening time into motherhood, shines.
It can be a very beautiful, raw, inner power, that might need drugs to help you in, considering the pain level, it doesn’t make us any less of a woman.
The ideal plan might need nudging in its negotiations, it might actually be completely tossed right out the window, does it really matter? as long as the life within you, comes out safe, sound and healthy.
Some things can be completely out of our control because the situation can become unpredictable.
When we go with the flow, ride the wave and remember our breath in whatever way helps us find it, life can move easier.
Every birth is different, every baby is different, every plan is different, every story is different, but each birth of living life follows a “similar script”.
A baby is born.
This is my first time mom labor and delivery stories, 1 of trillions.
